HAPPY HOUR FRIDAY

I can't believe it's already time for another Happy Hour. This week has just flown by, and that makes me happy.

I'm happy that last night's Habitat for Humanity meeting went so well. If you remember a few weeks ago we had an H4H retreat at my house and did some strategic planning. Well last night was the first time we implemented one of the new strategies and it went really well. Of course, my part was just a little silly... mainly because I'm a little silly. I was going to write everything down that I wanted to say, but then decided just to take a nap shoot from the hip. So needless to say, when I got up in front of everyone I really didn't know what I wanted to say and kinda went in circles. But I made a couple good jokes and talked about some serious stuff so I guess it all went okay. No one got mad at me for being too flippant so I guess it's all good.

Then last night after the meeting a few of us went out for a cocktail and it was all paid for by my favorite ninja. Due to unforeseen circumstances, the H4H meeting had to be moved from our usual place to a local country club. It's the "posh" place to be in town or well, it used to be up until about 10 years ago when the whole place kinda went to crap. They don't take cash there, and since the ninja is a member she got to pay for everything. Thanks ninja! The problem tho is that the wine I had was kinda crappy. I didn't realize it while I was drinking it. It actually tasted pretty good. I didn't realize that it wasn't good wine until I woke up at 2am with a r-a-g-i-n-g headache. Massive. I mean, I thought my head might just explode. And I only had two glasses. That's right. TWO. I wasn't even tipsy when I left. And yet, I thought I might die this morning. I'm wondering if that's the reason why we let our membership drop a few years back... I'll have to think about this. Either way, those two free drinks didn't feel very free this morning. And they won't be free for the ninja when she gets her bill.

Tonight we are going to the Blues game (actually, I'll be posting this when we get home from the game). Hubs is taking me *somewhere* for dinner first. I'm not sure where, he wouldn't tell me. He said it was a surprise. I bet it'll be Johnny's. It's in kind of a revitalized part of St Louis that's known for Mardi Gras parades and stuff like that. Johnny's is known for it's hottie waitresses. I've never been there, but hubs has... Hmmm...Time to go, I'll update when I get back

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Wow that was fast, huh? Well I know you're dying to know, so yes, it was Johnny's that we went to. It wasn't as sleazy as I thought it was going to be, but it was just a bar with very skimpily clad waitresses. My cheeseburger was good tho. It was pretty crowded, it's known as kind of a pre-hockey game hang-out. They even have shuttles to and from the game. It was fun. My cosmo was good (both of them).

I'm happy that I'm married. Seriously. We shared a table at the restaurant with a couple on their first date. They were cute and all, but they were young (25ish). Then at the game we were sitting in front of some 40-somethings that were obviously on their first date and it was sooo painful to listen too. It was all about the exes and the kids and the likes and the dislikes. It was just so... sad. But I have to admit, there is no greater feeling than when you're first falling in love with someone. Do you remember that feeling? When the sun is always shining and you're always feeling good and looking good and whenever he looks at you there are butterflies in your tummy? That is an incredible feeling. But I wouldn't give up what I have for it.

Okay, lets recap: community service, wine, sports, slutty waitresses, cosmos, happily married. Yep, sounds like a happy hour to me. Hope you have a great weekend! Link-up!

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update: while reading some of the comments I think I've given the wrong impression of Johnny's. It is skimpily clad servers... but it's really not too sleazy (not like a hooters rip-off). I'd say its more burlesque, or something you'd find near the Moulin Rouge. I think it's supposed to invoke a New Orleans style to it. And the crowd it draws is mainly the white-collar male (duh) aged 30-50 but also women and people in their 20s. If you're in the area it is an interesting place to go. If you yelp or UrbanSpoon it it gives great reviews.
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Random Tuesday

Just a few thoughts to get out of my head so that I can actually get some work done today. Maybe. Be sure to go see Un-Mom because this is all her fault.

Why do I insist upon wearing this blue and white stripped shirt even tho I know it makes me look like a rotund sailor?

How come I haven't put on real shoes in the last 3 days? I've been wearing my slippers. In my defense, you can't tell that they are slippers cuz they look like real shoes. Oh and a caveat, I have been wearing real work-out shoes, but then I take them off and put on my slippers after my shower.

Yesterday I gave blood and now I have a bruise. On the bright side it's just a small bruise, not like last time when my whole upper arm was bruised. On the brighter side than that, they could actually use my blood this time. Last time it clotted too quickly so I had that big-ass bruise for nothing.

It's really hard to get someone's tone thru cyberspace. If you think I'm being mean, chances are it's a miscommunication. I'm actually fairly nice. Well, unless you kick me out of your office... but we don't talk about that. Or if you call me fat, then I might not be nice either. Or if you make fun of my Momma, then I'll have to open up a can of whoop-ass on ya. Hmmm, maybe if you snub me in public, then I'll be mean. Or if you make fun of my kids. Or my fat dog (she's on a diet by the way... and not at all pleased with me). My point is, just talk to me. I joke around a lot and try not to take things too seriously, especially on this blog, but I would never intentionally try to hurt feelings. There's enough evil in the world, I don't think I need to contribute to it.

I have several opportunities on the horizon to meet fellow bloggers and also to see some old friends. This month The Funky Art Queen and her sister are coming to St. Louis and we are going to try to get together. Oh, fyi Barb, you're coming too (I forgot to tell you). Then in march before our cruise we are going to spend a couple days in San Diego so I'll get to see an old friend, Big Red (aka Jim). I'm not sure he really exists tho since he doesn't have a blog, but he does have a fb page. Okay then over spring break, whenever the hell that is, I'm hoping to get up to Chicago to see Tori (and not shop at all... haha). Then hopefully a blogapalooza will be in the mix at Ali's house in April (there's still some space I think so go see her). Then finally in either April or May I'll be heading back to Reno. Look out Sara, I'll be stopping by at some point... I'll let you tell me when tho :) So I'm really excited and keeping my fingers crossed.

I think that's enough rambling for one day. Add that to my nap I took earlier and I haven't gotten anything done today. Hope you have a great tuesday. Don't forget to go see Un-Mom and see who else is playing.

Happy Hour Friday

It's Happy Hour Friday once again and I'm not even late! Woohoo! That's enough to make you happy, isn't it? But just wait, there's so much more.

I'm happy that good ol' slasher Norm is redoing our basement. We have some seriously ugly old blue berber down there and he is replacing it with other things. The "main" part of the basement, or tv room, (or man-cave, whatever) is mahogany hard wood. There is also kind of a foyer area that is black and white check tile, and then the rest of the basement will be black tile (we were going to do the check throughout, but it was kinda busy). I'd like to have the mahogany throughout, but it's kinda pricey, and it is just a basement afterall. So, right now it's a disaster down there and we can't even go down there to watch tv, but hopefully it'll be done soon.

I'm happy that one of those rooms down there will be my new craft room! Yippee! I am so excited (can you tell? I'm like bursting with energy over here. No, wait. I just have to pee). Okay, yes, I am excited. But I can't figure out what color to paint it. So far the suggested colors have been orange, blue, and turquoise (with hints of purple?). What are your thoughts? What colors are supposed to inspire creativity? It can't be too dark. It's a basement room with not-enough lighting (I'll be buying a couple floor lamps tho I think) and it'll have a dark tile floor. There's a window, but it's northerly facing and has a deck above it and woods behind it, so basically no natural light.  I need help!

I'm happy that it's only 35 days until I cruise with husband to the Mexican Riviera. Of course, this is his make-up gift for not letting me go to BC3 in Denmark. It has been suggested that the reason he won't let me go to any BCs is that he's being too parental (not parenteral, that would mean that he's feeding me through other means than the intestines, like a vein or something -- fyi). I would like to believe that he'd just rather spend a week on the ocean alone with me. Unfortunately I think the first supposition is the correct one. He wont let me go overseas to meet my new internet friends because he thinks I'll get axed. That kinda makes me not too happy, but I do get a week's cruise out of it so I guess I'll just hold on to that anger for our next fight. THEN I'll bring it up and he can suffer the consequences... right? On the other hand... we don't fight very much. I might forget about it. Grrr. The perils of a happy marriage. Dang it.

Umm, I'm sure I have more to be happy about, but I actually have a load of work to do. Our Habitat chapter is about to start choosing not one but two new families. As chair of the family selection committee that means that I have a poop-load to do before the families can be chosen. Yikes. So, I need to get busy with time-lines and applications and presentations etc etc blah blah blah.

That's it for me folks! Link up and play HHF with me. And don't forget to go see poor old Otie even tho I don't think he's joining us this week...

All right damn it all to hell. Mr Linky isn't working. If you want to play just leave me a note in your comments and I'll hook you up later.

No. Nonono. Let's soothe that wild hair and try this one from Simply Linked. Let me know what you think...

about last night...

 I think I may have mentioned that last night the junior service club had it's annul mice races and casino night fundraiser. If you've never been to one you should go, it's pretty fun. Here's a link, but this isn't ours, it's just a random one I found on the web. Anyway, that's where I was last night, and because of that I will be hanging my head in shame, avoiding the the knowing looks, trying desperately not to listen to the whispers behind my back.

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I was the drunk one and made a fool of myself dancing on the roulette table. You're thinking that all the fine ladies who are members of the club will no longer let me near their husbands. You're thinking that it's 7th grade all over again and no one's parents will let their child come over to my house... (what? You don't remember that post? Well don't bother looking for a link. I've given you enough fodder for a lifetime worth of humiliation, I don't think I need to link it. But I think it's in the archives somewhere if you're that interested).

No, I'm afraid what happened is much worse.

If you've been around for a while you may have gotten the impression that I'm a tad... well, okay a little more than a tad... but I'm very slightly a little bit... vain. Except it's not that I'm conceited or think I'm beautiful or anything, it's more because I'm totally insecure. I really am. I'm always afraid I have food in my teeth or boogers or something. Maybe I sat in something and there's a big brown stain on my butt. Or my muffin top is just a bit too prominent. There is a whole host of potential flaws I obsess about, so I often find a mirror to make sure that those problems are all in my head and haven't manifested themselves irl. Only last night I didn't have a mirror. And I really wish I did.

Here's the set up: as one of the "mice girls" (you know, I'm on the jsc committee for the fundraiser so I had to work part of the evening) my job is the "roaming trivia gal" -- yeah I'm a "gal," it said so in the program. Anyway, my job last night was to roam around the room with a bag of goodies and some trivia questions. It's actually really fun. I get to go from table to table and talk to everyone in the room. I joke around and laugh and have fun and, well, maybe bat my eyes a little... you know, all the normal stuff you do when working a crowd.  It's my thing and I love doing it every year. Last night was no exception. I hit the groups of guys, the ladies sitting by themselves looking bored, the mayor, the husbands, the wives, the old people, the hotties, the not-so-hotties... everyone. I don't think there were many people that I didn't chat up.

Several times during the course of the evening I stopped by our table and asked husband if I looked okay:

How are my teeth?

Fine.

How about my nose?

Fine.

Do I look okay?

Yes, dear.

It's important you know. I'm talking to lots of people.

You look fine hon. Could you get me a beer?

I believed him. I remember at one point thinking that maybe I'd scoot off to the ladies room just to check, but then decided I was paranoid. After all, husband really looked, right? He looked like he looked.

So the evening came to a close and we headed home. I was in a pretty good mood because although hubs and I didn't win any of the races -- actually we came home empty handed which was kind of a bummer -- I spent the evening giving away prizes and that's always fun. So we get home and say goodnight to the kiddos and head upstairs. I walked into the bathroom and started to get ready for bed and looked in the mirror.

Then I looked in the mirror again.

Then I looked again and shrieked "what the hell is in my hair!!??"

Hubs is like, "I don't see anything"

"What the HELL do you mean, you don't see anything? Look at those FLAKES!"

OMG. I had flakes. Not just a few flakes, but a lot of big yucky looking flakes in my hair. My dark brown hair.

wth? I don't have dandruff. I don't usually have a problem with a dry scalp. Granted I keep a bottle of head & shoulders around because my scalp can get dried out in the winter, but I haven't needed it. I just had my hair done earlier this week and David didn't mention a thing.And the flakes were all on the left side. Is that totally bizarre or what? I was totally racking my brain trying to think of what was going on. I use hair products, usually bumble and bumble, but I've never had a problem like this with them. I straightened my hair yesterday... maybe I didn't get all the product out?

Of course the next thought was all those people I spent the last three hours chatting up. Oh my god. The men. The women. The mayor and his wife. All my friends husbands. All my friends! OMG. Why didn't someone say something???

Then I started thinking back. What about the woman I sat next to and asked if she wanted to win a prize? She looked at my head. Oh oh, what about those two guys sitting at the middle table near the wall? I got down on one knee when I was talking to them, they were looking right at my head. Oh and the woman that knew husbands ex-wife. I bet she had a freakin field day with my flakes. 

Then of course I just got mad. Really stinking burning mad. Why on earth would my friends just let me go on like that looking like I just stepped out of... out of... out of somewhere with dandruff? I would never do that. I'm the one who tells you that you're dragging toilet paper from your shoe. I'm the one who tells you your tag is sticking out. I'm the one who tells you there is lipstick on your teeth. All discreetly of course so you can fix the problem without being embarrassed.

So now, I'll be the pariah. I'll be talked about for years. And then some. Big Flakey Bambi will be my new nickname. I'm crushed. I'm hurt. I'm thinking God has just smote me for being vain.

Dammit. I wish I had just gotten drunk and mooned the mayor...

Happy Hour Friday

Here we are again at another happy hour. What? You mean this looks different? What the heck? Well, don't fret, you're in the right spot. Our dear Otie has decided to take a break from the Happy Hour Scene, but he'll show up once in a while. So since it's just you and me let's belly on up to the bar and start drinking. The others will be a long shortly.

I am happy that I have a collaboration post with GregoryJ from living my life. If you may recall in this weeks RTT, I mentioned the fact that on days I don't work I never get anything done. Greg commented that he and his colleagues were discussing the very same thing. After a few emails back and forth Greg and I came up with the Would-Be Bambi Laws of Non-Accomplishment. Here they are for your general use:

1. Time verses Work Accomplished are inversely proportional (T = 1/WA) -- ie the more time you have, the less work gets done
   
2. With an over-abundance of Time minimal Work is achieved (T = -W) -- ie on your day off you won't get anything done
   
3. An over-abundance of Laborers to perform a task is inversely proportional to the Time it takes said task to be achieved (+L = 1/T) -- ie if you have too many people working on a job, the less work actually gets done
4. The addition of a Spouse to any Laborer equals less Work Accomplished, unless that Spouse is female, then the addition of a Spouse equals less Work Accomplished Correctly by Laborer and therefore an overall increase in work output (L+S = -WA) or (L+S(f) = -WA(c) = +WA)
5. The addition of Children to the Work rena equals twice as much Time spent working but only half as much Work Accomplished [Wa+C = 2T(1/2WA)] -- ie if your kids help, plan on doing it twice
6. An increase in Solar Energy equals a decrease in Work Accomplished (+SE = 1/WA) -- ie if it's a beautiful day no work gets done
7. A decrease in Solar Energy equals a decrease in Work Accomplished (-SE = -WA) -- ie if it's a crappy day no work gets done
8. The Number of times the phone rings is inversely proportional to Work Accomplished  (Pn = 1/WA)
9. The Number of breaks taken is inversely proportional to amount of Work Accomplished (Nb = 1/WA)
10. If Methane gas is expressed, there is no Work Accomplished (CH4 = 0WA) ie if someone farts, work is stopped, room is evacuated

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Okay well needless to say, these laws make me happy! 

I'm happy that although I was at a meeting and got home late last night, husband was happy I woke him up rather than finish my HHF post. Oops, sorry Otin. That's why it's late. 

I'm happy that Barb and I (and spouses of course) are going to see Grease at the Fox tonight. We have front row seats (thanks to hubby's colleague) so that makes it extra happy.  Plus we are going out to dinner first, then out for drinks after the show with some of our good friends. All in all I'm pretty sure it's gonna be a fun night. The downside is that I have to get up and work saturday morning. 

Saturday night we also have plans. It's the Mice Races, one of Junior Services big fundraisers. It's also a lot of fun so I'm looking forward to it. 

Well I guess that's it for me. Sorry I'm late posting, but at least I'm not dead... right? 

Link up here with Mr Linky and see who else is playing. Cheers! 

 

Panic

I awoke to another gray morning. The fog hovered at the mid-line of the trees as the mist gathered in droplets on the window pane. It wasn't quite raining yet, however I knew it would be several hours before we saw the sun, if at all. I found it ironic that yesterday I found peace and solitude in the brume, while today it portended evil.
The dogs wriggled with excitement at the mention of a walk through the golf course. There was usually a sighting or two of deer, foxes, or other wildlife unlucky enough to have Juneau pick up it's scent. This morning was no different. A herd of deer were grazing along the edge of the woods that surround the golf course. Juneau took off like a shot, but of course he was no match for the graceful leaps and bounds of the deer, and they were well out of sight within seconds. Not one to be despondent about losing the chase, Juneau returned to the task of ferreting out squirrels and other small animals while still on the look-out for the big prize such as a fox or raccoon. Jenny, true to form, labored along beside me, her extra weight slowing her down.
Our morning stroll came to an end a short time later. I gathered the dogs in, wiped paws and put on collars, and told each of them what well behaved dogs they were. Once inside, I sat down at the kitchen table for my morning ritual of coffee and the New York Times crossword before changing from my walking-the-dog gear to my work-out gear. After a quick energy bar for breakfast, I gave the dogs a treat and told them to watch the house while I went to the gym. I turned on the radio for them and walked out the door.
At the gym I had a pretty good work-out. I ran a couple quick miles, pleased at having beat my previous record time. Then Shaun, my trainer, set about to completely annihilate any thoughts of ever raising my arms above my head again by giving me a strenuous upper-body work-out. Although it felt like torture at the time, I was thankful for the opportunity to train with her.
I was still feeling the after effects in my biceps as I pulled back into the drive-way. I raised the garage door and pulled into my usual spot. As I headed around the rear of the car, I was careful not to step in the wet tire tracks, as I didn't want to have to take my shoes off upon entering the house. I looked down to step over the second track and noticed a wet footprint.
'Well that's odd...' I thought to myself. My inner alarm bells were starting to clang. I knew I purposely stepped over the wet tracks. I went for a closer look at the footprint, and hesitantly placed my sneaker-clad foot into the print. I was much longer and much wider than my shoes, and obviously belonging to a man. I suddenly regretted that I had signed up for a photography class at the YMCA instead of the self-defense class.
I tried to quell my rising panic by thinking rationally. It wasn't Bob, I knew that for a fact as I had just gotten off the phone with him while in the car. It definitely wasn't any of the girls; not only were they at school, but their feet were not that big. I tried to recall anyone else that might have access to our garage door codes. Dave the Orkin man, but he only comes April through October, it couldn't be him. Besides, his truck was not in the driveway. Frank, the dry cleaner delivery man, knows the code, but he only comes on Monday and Thursday. Today is Wednesday, so it couldn't be him...
As I went down my mental list of potential workers who could know the door codes, I suddenly had another realization: The dogs weren't barking. Every time I come home I am greeted by my two barking, wagging, yipping dogs. I can usually hear them as soon as I exit the car. Today, however, there was nothing.
The hair on the back of my neck started to rise and my panic was palpable. Who the heck had been here? Where did he come from and why? Where were the dogs? And then the thought that gave me the chills - was he still in the house?
Flashbacks from '80s slasher movies were zipping past my line of sight. Half bodies stuffed in cabinets, blood dripping from the ceiling, body parts laying forgotten in the wake of mayhem. I could almost see Micheal's mask, Freddy's knives, and Leatherface's chainsaw. I quickly thought of my neighbors who would possibly be home in case I started shouting bloody murder... I couldn't think of any...
I got control of my panic and quietly crept into the kitchen, senses tingling and adrenalin pulsing through my veins.
I saw the dogs on the back porch and relief spread over me like a warm blanket. Someone had put them outside, but they were okay. I let them in, but they gave no hint of who had put them out there. They didn't appear any worse for the wear, and there was no indication that the person was still in the house.
I racked my brain for an explanation. Who would put my dogs outside but not harm them? Then it occurred to me that as I was driving into the subdivision someone honked their horn. I didn't recognize the vehicle so I dismissed the thought all together. Suddenly I put the pieces in place.
The slasher that came into my house

was

none other

than...

NORM!!!

He had to come over this morning to fix youngest daughter's closet shelf. I had forgotten that he just got a new car, that's why I didn't recognize it. I had also forgotten that I asked him to come over.

So, needless to say, I am not dead. Nor am I in pieces. I will tho, in the future, try to remember that when I am drinking wine and making plans for people to stop by, I NEED TO WRITE MYSELF A NOTE SO THAT I DON'T SCARE MYSELF TO DEATH!!!

Random Tuesday Thoughts

Be sure to go see the Un-Mom for the original Random Tuesday Thoughts. This is her fault you know.

How come on days I don't work I never seem to get anything done? I don't think I sit around eating bon-bons all day. And I can't remember the last time I watched Oprah. What's the deal?

I took about 140 pix at the gym today for the Flickr 365 in 2010 project. Most of them weren't any good, but I think I had a few good ones. Go here to check out my photostream. But if you don't want to (I know, I'm kinda lazy like that too) here is one of the pix I like. I call it 'motion'. What do you think?

How does it make you feel when someone ignores your friend request on facebook? I think I've been ignored. I'm not *sure* -- but I'm pretty sure. It doesn't really matter, I haven't spoken to the woman in 20 years, why the hell should I care? I think it's the only person that's actually ignored me tho. Kinda makes me wonder. It kinda makes me feel inadequate. Didn't I get over that crap years ago? So now, not only does it bother me that I'm being ignored, it bothers me that it bothers me. I think I'll just have another glass of wine. And think about how wonderful I am. Wait, lemme ask Bob.... Okay, he says I'm wonderful. I guess that's enough.

Woke up to a fabulously foggy morning today. I love fog, it always seems to bring a dreamlike quality to my day. Granted, I don't like driving in it when it's thick as pea soup, but I love walking in it. Unfortunately by the time I got back from my morning stroll with the dogs the fog has somewhat lifted, but I think I got some decent pictures in:

Jenny just farted and it really stinks. Why is she so gassy and Juneau isn't? They eat the same food. Phew... I might have to leave the room...

Well I guess that is it for me. Be sure to go see Un-Mom!